Strength-Based Isn’t Always Strong Enough: Why Parents Must Push for Rights-Based IEPs

A rights-based IEP doesn’t just describe who your child is; it names what they need. It clearly outlines the accommodations, supports, and structural changes required to ensure your child has equitable access to education. It holds the school accountable, not just because it is best practice, but because it is the law. When we water down the IEP with feel-good language and avoid identifying barriers, we risk denying our children the very rights meant to protect them.

Parents are the experts on their children. You know your child better than anyone. You know what helps them thrive, what triggers distress, and what supports actually work. Yet too often, parents are heavily influenced by school staff during the IEP process. You may be encouraged to focus only on strengths, minimize concerns, or accept vague accommodations. But a strong IEP must reflect what you know about your child, not just what school personnel are comfortable including.

It is also critical to understand the difference between strategies and accommodations. Strategies are often student-focused. They expect the child to do something differently in order to succeed. Accommodations, on the other hand, shift the responsibility to the system. They are legally binding changes to the environment, instruction, or assessment that ensure access. A student should not have to work harder or “overcome” barriers that the school has a duty to remove. If an IEP includes only strategies but lacks concrete accommodations, it fails to meet the legal standard of support.

The IEP process does not end when the meeting ends. What matters most is the written plan because that is what schools are held accountable for. Too often, there are long delays between the meeting and the time the finalized IEP is actually created or shared. During that period, your child may be going without critical accommodations. That is not acceptable.

Once the IEP meeting has been held, ask for a copy of the IEP. Do not wait. Follow up until you have it in your hands. Then read it carefully. Go through every goal, every sentence, and every listed support. Look at the language. Reflect on whether the goals are simply feel-good fluff or whether they truly hold the school accountable for meeting your child’s needs.

If the plan does not reflect your child’s needs, ask for it to be changed. If the accommodations are vague, incomplete, or missing, ask for them to be added. If the language downplays your child’s disability or fails to name the barriers they face, insist that it be revised. Do not settle for a document that sounds nice but offers no real support.

As a parent, you have the right to ask for documentation that shows how your child is progressing toward their IEP goals. This is not only reasonable but essential for ensuring accountability. Progress reports should be specific, measurable, and clearly tied to the goals outlined in the IEP. If you are not receiving regular updates, or if the information is vague or inconsistent, request written documentation from the school. Ask for data that demonstrates whether meaningful progress is being made. If progress is not evident, the IEP team is required to review and revise the plan. Following up regularly helps ensure that your child receives the support they need to succeed.

You have the right to demand an IEP that is clear, concrete, and grounded in your child’s legal entitlement to an accessible education. The IEP is not a wish list or a vague promise. It should be a living, working document that ensures your child gets what they need to learn and belong.

Hold the system to it. Your child deserves nothing less.

The IEP may be one of the strongest advocacy tools you have as a parent. It is your written record of what the school has agreed to do. If it is not being followed, there are steps you can take to hold the system accountable. But that starts with an IEP grounded in truth, not just optimism.

Your child does not have to earn support by being easy to work with, positive, or compliant. They are entitled to the accommodations they need to learn, belong, and thrive. A strength-based IEP is not enough unless it is also a rights-based IEP.

Do not settle. Review the IEP. Ask the questions. Insist on clarity.

Your child has rights.
As their parent, your voice and your knowledge matter.

Strength-based approaches protect the system when they ignore your child’s rights. A rights-based IEP protects your child.